A walk by the river

It’s been awhile since my last post, mainly because I’ve been really good except for the occasional foray into the bin, knocking a cup of coffee over with my tail which soaked Mrs. Parks mobile that unfortunately didn’t work for twenty four hours and, I don’t know if I mentioned that one day when I couldn’t see the missus at the park, I thought it was best to walk myself home? I thought she’d done the same! She wasn’t that pleased when she arrived an hour later and found me there. I don’t know why it made sense to me!

Anyway I digress; on a walk the other day by the River Mersey,  I wasn’t happy to wear my muzzle (you my dear friends will know that this is a most unfair contraption..besides the fact that I look like Hannibal Lecter…it is nigh impossible to catch squirrels) and as the Parks’ wouldn’t remove it I came up with a cunning plan which almost worked.

There was a sweet young couple in front of us whom I judged to be kindly and compassionate,  so as they walked past them..I crept in between the couple and nudged the nice young lady with my muzzle on her leg. I am absolutely convinced that if they hadn’t spotted me and called me away she would have taken pity on me and removed the the darn thing. Why they apologised I have no idea!

So my dear friends who are blighted with these monstrosities if you would like to try out my plan or know how to adapt it: please let me know.

Yours as always

Snatch.

My ideal puddle.

This my friends, is what I call a real puddle. As you can see though, I had finished playing and left Mr. Parks there. I don’t know why he’s so bothered about wet legs!

I’m still alive!

I have just come back on line and apologise to 2b14u who commented on my blog. Thank you.

I have had many pleasurable days, running through the long grass and rolling around in it. I hope this picture demonstrates it well. For any humans that may wish to try this manoeuvre please remember that the head has to touch the ground first.

On a more sober note, I have unfortunately due to my activities managed to become a home for pesky fleas which seem to really like my warm body. I hope to elicit many sympathy votes for the suffering that I have endured because of my predicament.

A)   Two, yes two applications of flea drops that didn’t work…I won’t name the brands.

B)   Plus one application of industrial strength flea killer drops (which apparently can kill rabbits and cats if they get it on them)

C)  Being banned from the BED!!!! and bedroom. I dutifully ignored them, when they spoke to me!

D)  And…I bet you thought this couldn’t get worse….I was not allowed to get wet for forty eight hours…so as it rained and rained and rained….I couldn’t go out….my only relief was the garden. Bah Humbug!

Although the situation has now been resolved. I haven’t forgotten………and it will take a lot of Bonio’s to make up for this.

I hope to be in a better mood when I talk to you next.

Woofs and kisses

Snatch.

 

 

 

How could you possibly resist????

 

This is what all those softies who look at this face say…I suppose my cousin Bob could be classed as cute…I can’t quite see it myself….there is a nice looking Alsation lass that I see at the park, Sasha now she is what I would call wellfit cute.

But because he has badgered me so much to put up a picture of him (that he likes, he wasn’t that keen on my previous post for some reason) I have finally relented, so here we are all you lonely female pooches who want a ‘Pin Up’ to brighten your day, this is Bob the Dog.

Luv always

Snatch.

 

Who’s That Dog? or more specifically Where’s That Dog?

Hi to all my fellow hounds.

Yesterday I took Mr. Park out for a walk, nothing personal to my carer/trainer but the park has been a little boring recently, no squirrels, no snow, a splattering of rain and a few good puddles but nothing to write home about.

But today…….Mmmm…it was… shall I say….. more eventful?

I saw a few friends that I played ‘chase’ with and all was going quite well really until…well, you see there were these two small dogs and I thought ‘shall I?’ (they are not my favourite playmates). But I decided that, as I was there and we would be going home soon… ‘Why not!’

I did, admittedly, iniate the race. The small white dog seemed to be up for it as I started running in that direction, then I noticed that it wasn’t racing in a circle as most canines do….he/she was tearing along in a straight line! As we got nearer to the park entrance, I realised that he/she wasn’t going to stop!!!!

I’ve never had that effect on another dog before.

From the distance I could hear shouting and yelling….I slowly rounded to a halt and looked behind me…Mr. Park was standing there with a look of horror on his face, his mouth wide open and this woman was speeding across the grass.

The small white dog had disappeared from view out of the park. I suppose, that as there is a busy road outside the gates this might have contributed to the panic? With the action all over, I was ready to go home but Mr. Park insisted on staying to find out if the dog was okay, honestly what are these humans like?

I told this story to my cousin Bob and he said I should tell you how it all ended, just in case you were worried about ‘the poor little thing‘ what a big softy he is!

Anyway, apparently what happened was, this man in a white van had witnessed the event, pulled over and picked up the dog and then he brought it back to the park and passed it to its owner, no harm done! So there we go…a happy ending! I did hear Mr. Park give a huge sigh of relief and he looked very pleased when the dog was handed over.

I don’t think I will be allowed to play with that dog anymore.

Love and woofs ’til next time,

Snatch.

 

 

Yoga for us

Hi fellow hounds,

Yes, I know I’ve only wrote a blog a couple of days ago, but couldn’t keep this to myself. I believe I mentioned that I like to run and chase squirrels, but I’m sorry to say that this does not apply to all of us canines.

I must admit that it came as a bit of a shock when I found out, but as technically, he is my cousin, I will have to live with it. I am referring to my cousin Bob, who is a Great Dane (personally Iwould have thought he would have chosen to be named -Hans Christian or Viggo but Bob it is..)

Bob, who lives with Mr. and Miss. Bob  does not enjoy moving at a fast pace, he prefers to move to a more gentil tempo and has recently discovered the art of yoga.

Pose of a Windswept Tree.

To begin: Lie on your back, firstly stretch all four legs into the air, take a deep breath….hold…. then slowly move your rear legs to outstretched position…slowly breathe out. Keep back legs in this position then repeat as above for your front legs. Relax in this position for a long as possible, gently breathing in and out.

There! apparently its as easy as that! Haven’t tried it myself yet, but if any of you have I would love to hear about your experience.

If you have any problems with this manouvre, please refer to the picture below, which Bob has graciously forwarded to me for demonstration purposes:

Yours ’til next time

Xxxx

How to make a Bed

Hi to all fellow hounds,

What I would like to share with you today is some ‘owner training’.

Now, I have been working very hard to train mine since I first came to live with them, to keep their identity a secret I shall call them…Mr and Mrs. Park (that is my favourite place), but alas they are not so quick on the uptake so unfortunately it has taken me longer than I anticipated, but they do try, bless!

Today’s lesson is a basic: How to make a bed!

For some unknown reason Mrs. Park has the notion that a bed should be all prim and proper, smoothed out, neat and tidy. No, no, no, my dear, a bed should be arranged so that it is comfortable when you lie down on it. Call it ‘instinct’ if you must, but it should ideally be contoured into a nice little mound so that you can curl up in the middle or fit it to your shape.

So comrades, I’m sure that you have demonsrated this countless times to your people but just in case you are not getting the message through just show them the picture below. Mrs. Park had spent ages, smoothing out and decreasing and I couldn’t take anymore so I rearranged it for her.

’til next time, woof.

Snatch.